Cultivating a Home Podcast

A homeschooling mom of seven. Her husband died suddenly. And every day she got in her van, drove a few doors down to a parking lot, and just sat there with God because it was the only place she could.
That is what a quiet time looks like when life is too full and too hard for anything neat or official.
On today's episode, Rhonda and Melissa wrap up their series on Spiritual Growth and get practical about the everyday habits that build a real faith: personal Bible study, prayer, scripture memory, community, and service. Not as a checklist, but as a relationship. Rhonda shares what she said to her kids when they would sit down with Proverbs at breakfast, how she used a pill bottle full of index cards to make scripture memory stick for different learning styles, and why the posture we bring to time with God matters more than the format.
She also closes with one of the most freeing reminders in the series: God is not keeping score. If you missed yesterday, or last week, or longer than that, He still says, "Come." Grace abounds. Do the next right thing and show up.
Topics Covered in This Episode
[0:01:43] Redefining Quiet Time as Knowing God
[0:06:13] Desperate for God: Lisa’s Quiet-Time Survival Story
[0:09:00] Making Space for God in a Busy Mom’s Day
[0:14:17] Training a Teachable Heart with Scripture
[0:14:40] Creative Strategies for Scripture Memory
[0:16:35] Power of Like-Minded, Iron-Sharpening Friendships
[0:18:12] Serving Starts at Home and Flows Outward
[0:20:29] Moving from Checklist Faith to Grace-Filled Relationship
 
Key Scriptures
2 Timothy 3:16-17 "All Scripture is breathed out by God and is profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work."
Psalm 42:1 "As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, my God."
Psalm 119:11 "I have stored up your word in my heart that I might not sin against you."
Galatians 5:13 (referenced) "Serve one another humbly in love."
Matthew 11:28 (referenced) "Come to me, all you who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest."
Key Quotes
"Even in those times when the quiet time for us is just sitting in silence saying, Lord, I'm here. Will you meet me where I am? He's exchanging your heartache with His compassion."
"God is gentle. He doesn't reveal everything in our lives at once that we need to deal with. He shares things if we're listening and have a teachable heart."
"Grace abounds with Christ. Just pick up, do the next right thing, pick up where you left off."
"Serving starts in our home. When you get up to get ice cream, ask if anybody else wants some."
"We built our life on a rock. When rough times come, you have that foundation."
Episode Takeaways
Pick a time and protect it, even if it is small. Five minutes at breakfast with your Bible open counts. A podcast sermon while on the school run counts. You do not need a perfect hour. You need a decision to show up consistently. Start with what actually fits your life right now, not the version of your life you wish you had.
Try Proverbs by the day of the month. Whatever today's date is, read a few verses from that chapter of Proverbs. Do it at breakfast or dinner with your kids. Give an example that fits the age of whoever is sitting at the table. Let the chapter do the teaching.
If you have missed time with God, just come back. Not after you get yourself together. Not after you figure out a better routine. Right now, wherever you are. He says come. That is the whole invitation.
Resources + Links
 
A Woman After God's Own Heart by Elizabeth George
 
Warren Wiersbe
Beth Moore
Let’s Keep The Conversation Going! 
New episodes are released every Thursday. Be sure to follow, rate, and subscribe so you don’t miss what’s coming next.
Have a question for Rhonda? Submit it on cultivatingahome.com
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/therhondaellis 
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/TheRhondaEllis 
Visit us at: http://cultivatingahome.com 

What do you do when life falls apart, and you cannot fix it?
 
In Episode 16 of Cultivating a Home, Rhonda and Melissa step away from the practical and go somewhere deeper: the walk with Christ that makes every other part of home life possible. Rhonda shares what she has learned through decades of hard seasons, a builder who took their money and disappeared, a house sale that fell through, a traumatic brain injury, and the moment she sat in a college infirmary and quietly propped up her phone to take a picture as her son received a cancer diagnosis.
 
Rhonda introduces a simple yet profound framework that has changed how she approaches hard seasons: spiritual growth comes not from what we do but from what we believe. She walks through what it looks like to release rumination and give things to God, how to turn everyday kid problems into discipleship moments without manufacturing them, and why the times of deepest suffering have consistently been the times of closest intimacy with Christ.
 
They also discuss the stones of remembrance tradition her family keeps in their den, a container of flat stones with dates and moments written in Sharpie, each one a record of God's faithfulness through something hard.
 
Part one of two. Next week, the conversation moves into the practical side: Bible study, prayer, and scripture memory.
 
Topics Covered in This Episode
[0:01:46] When Crisis Becomes the Catalyst for Faith
[0:02:46] Spiritual Growth Comes From Belief, Not Busyness 
[0:04:35] Trusting God When Life Falls Apart 
[0:06:28] Don't Waste Your Suffering: Choosing Trust Over Escape 
[0:08:48] From Ruminating to Releasing: Letting God Carry the Load 
[0:10:45] Facing a Child's Cancer Diagnosis With a Trust-First Lens 
[0:12:35] Faith Over Feelings, Especially With Your Kids 
[0:13:34] Turning Everyday Kid Problems Into Discipleship Moments 
[0:15:30] Modeling Trust in Family Trials 
[0:16:33] Stones of Remembrance: Recording God's Faithfulness 
[0:19:18] Don't Waste a Crisis: Applying Scripture When It Hurts 
[0:21:23] Letting God Chisel Blind Spots and Heal Relationships 
[0:22:56] Practicing Silence in a Loud World 
[0:23:50] Be Still and Know: Meeting God in Creation
[0:24:33] Finding the Sweetness of God in Suffering 
[0:25:25] Spiritual Growth Starts With What You Believe About God
 
Key Scriptures
John 6:28-29 "When they said to him, 'What shall we do that we may work the works of God?' Jesus answered and said to them, 'This is the work of God, that you believe in Him whom He sent.'"
Psalm 46:10 (referenced) "Be still and know that I am God."
 
Key Quotes
"Spiritual growth comes not in what we do, but rather in what we believe. Spiritual growth comes from faith."
"Don't waste a crisis. Through it, say, Lord, let me know you more, and be more concerned with that than the solving of the situation."
"The sweetness of God has been met in my suffering."
"He chisels us, and that's part of our walk with Him, to grow more in His image. That's something we should actually be grateful for."
"Go sit at the beach. Watch a sunrise. Sit in the grass and look up at the trees. Be still and know that I am God."
 
Episode Takeaways
Start a stones of remembrance practice. It does not have to be a container of river stones. It can be a notebook, a note on your phone, or a jar with slips of paper. Pick one hard season God brought you through and write it down, including the date. Let that be the first stone. Add to it as He shows His faithfulness.
 
The next time a crisis hits, ask a different question. Instead of "Lord, get me out of this," try "Lord, let me know you through this." Write that second question somewhere you will see it. It does not mean you stop praying for the hard thing to end. It means you stop making the exit the only thing you ask for.
 
Find ten minutes of silence this week. Outside, if you can. No phone, no podcast, no background noise. Just sit and let God speak. If nothing comes, that is fine. The practice of stopping is the point. Start there.
 
Resources + Links
Let’s Keep The Conversation Going! 
New episodes release every Thursday. Be sure to follow, rate, and subscribe so you don’t miss what’s coming next.
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/therhondaellis 
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/TheRhondaEllis 
Visit us at: http://cultivatingahome.com 
Did this episode help you? Share it with a friend who's drowning in clutter or noise and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It means everything to a new show.

What if hospitality looked less like a dinner party and more like a prayer banner, a spiral notebook, and a backyard full of missionaries from around the world?
 
In this episode,  Rhonda and Melissa go beyond the meal and into the many creative ways a home can be used to love people well. Rhonda opens with the story of a middle school girl named Ashlyn who was fighting cancer, and how her family gathered a youth group, unrolled a roll of butcher paper, and sent a banner full of prayers and forged celebrity signatures to her hospital room.
 
From there, the conversation covers practical ways to lower the barriers that keep people from ever starting: go-to freezer meals, easy appetizers, what to keep on hand for last-minute company, and how to invite people who are different from you. Rhonda also shares what happened when she said yes to housing 16 missionary students in a rental property, and how that one decision turned into an annual tradition of hosting 100 people from around the world.
 
Topics Covered in This Episode
[0:02:12] Hospital Banner: Teaching Kids to Love in Crisis
[0:04:30] Low-Pressure Gatherings: Fun Over Formality
[0:05:57] Easy Go-To Meals: Prep to Reduce Stress
[0:08:21] Always-On-Hand Desserts & Snacks
[0:10:59] Naming Your Barriers and Solving Them
[0:12:30] Hospitality for Introverts: Leverage Conversation Starters
[0:15:09] Luke 14: Hospitality Beyond Your Inner Circle
[0:18:40] Training Kids to Welcome the Overlooked
[0:20:23] Hosting Missionaries: From One House to One Hundred Guests
[0:23:55] Mutual Blessing: You’re Ministered To as You Serve
[0:24:30] Redefining “No”: Not Now, Not You
[0:27:25] Letting an Imperfect Home Put Guests at Ease
[0:28:59] Simple Invites: Dessert, Soup, and Two Date Options
[0:30:20] Stop Apologizing: Drop the Self-Critique
[0:31:33] Partnering with Christ: A Lifestyle of “You’re Welcome Here”
Key Scripture
Luke 14:12-14 "He said also to the man who had invited him, 'When you give a dinner or a banquet, do not invite your friends or your brothers or your relatives or your rich neighbors, lest they also invite you in return and you be repaid. But when you give a feast, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed, because they cannot repay you, for you will be repaid at the resurrection of the just.'"
 
Key Quotes
"Don't let the fear of hearing no keep someone from ever having the opportunity to hear you're welcome here."
"We've been doing this ministry for so many years, and we have never had an American ask us into their home. Never."
"A no almost always means not now. It doesn't mean not you."
"An imperfect home often gives others permission to relax."
"Stop explaining your insecurities to your guests. You're putting them in an awkward position over something they were never even thinking about."
 
Episode Takeaways
Name your one barrier and solve it before next week. Whatever came to mind when you thought about having someone over is the thing to work on. Not a good cook? Pick one go-to meal and freeze the sauce in advance. Not sure what to say? Write down three questions before people arrive. Remove the barrier so it no longer keeps you waiting.
 
Give someone two dates instead of a vague invitation. The next time you want to have someone over, text them something specific: "Would Tuesday or Thursday work for you?" Two options are easier to say yes to than an open-ended "we should get together sometime."
 
Look beyond your usual circle this week. Ask God to show you one person who could use a welcome: a neighbor you have never really talked to, a new family at church, someone going through something hard. You do not have to plan a full dinner. Coffee on the back porch counts.
 
 Resources + Links
Let’s Keep The Conversation Going! 
New episodes release every Thursday. Be sure to follow, rate, and subscribe so you don’t miss what’s coming next.
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/therhondaellis 
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/TheRhondaEllis 
Visit us at: http://cultivatingahome.com 
Did this episode help you? Share it with a friend who's drowning in clutter or noise and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It means everything to a new show.

When you hear the word hospitality, what comes to mind? A perfectly styled table? A charcuterie board? A home that looks like it came off a Pinterest board?
In today's episode, Rhonda and Melissa go after that picture entirely and replace it with something much more honest and useful.
Rhonda opens with two stories: the undercooked potato she served to college friends in a trailer under 800 square feet, and the pastor she invited to dinner the day she forgot to turn on the crock pot. What she did both times tells you everything about what hospitality is actually for.
This episode covers the biblical mandate for opening your home, why almost every source of stress around hosting comes back to focusing on yourself, and what it looks like to train your kids to serve joyfully rather than grumble their way through prep. Rhonda also tackles perfectionism directly, the "after" trap that keeps women from ever starting, and the personal insecurities that make people feel unqualified to host.
Spoiler: nobody noticed the folded towels on the stairs.
You are already qualified. Start now.
 
Timestamps:
[0:01:30] Biblical Mandate for Hospitality 
[0:02:43] Start with Mindset, Not Square Footage 
[0:04:49] When Meals Flop, Connection Still Wins. 
[0:07:05] People Over Presentation 
[0:09:15] Connection, Not Perfection 
[0:11:34] Small Homes, Big Welcome 
[0:12:16] Training Kids to Serve Joyfully 
[0:19:59] Pivot Plans to Protect Peace 
[0:21:15] Match Hosting to Energy and Budget 
[0:23:13] Perfectionism Is Self-Focus 
[0:26:17] Stop Waiting for "After" to Start Hosting 
[0:27:06] Host Despite Insecurities 
 
Key Scriptures
1 Peter 4:9 "Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling."
Romans 12:13 "Share with the Lord's people who are in need. Practice hospitality."
 
Key Quotes
"People are looking for connection, not perfection. They would rather sit at your imperfect table than eat alone at their perfect one."
"Don't let your insecurity rob someone else of the encouragement they might have received in your home."
"The after often becomes years. Start now."
"When our mindset is on the other person instead of ourselves, it takes all the pressure off."
"God has given you the space that you live in. Share it."
 
Episode Takeaways
Invite one person over this week. Not after the remodel. Not when the house is cleaner. This week. It can be coffee on the back porch. It can be the pizza you ordered. Just open the door to one person and let that be enough.
The next time you catch yourself stressing about hosting, name your focus. Is it on you or on them? Write down one specific thing you can do to shift it back to the guest. Then do that thing instead of the thing you were stressing about.
Include your kids in the next time you have people over. Give them a job that is theirs. Tell them ahead of time who is coming and why. Ask them what questions they could ask to get to know your guests better. Let them be part of the welcome, not just the cleanup.

What do you do when a conflict catches you off guard, and you want to fire back immediately? What about when someone in your life, a friend, a spouse, a child, says something that stings but might actually be true?
 
In today’s episode of Cultivating a Home, Rhonda and Melissa close out their three-part conversation on friendship by delving into the harder territory: conflict, repair, boundaries, and the honest self-examination that makes it all possible.
 
Rhonda shares the story of a harsh email from a consultant she genuinely liked, and how pausing before responding led to one of the best friendships she ever built. She also shares a quieter, more personal story about a homeschooling event at her house, a phone call earlier that same day, and the moment a friend told her she had not been fully truthful.
 
The episode also covers what to do when a friend enters a life stage you are longing for, how to stay peaceful with people who hold different beliefs, and the book quote that changed how Rhonda thinks about every choice she makes in a week.
 
This conversation applies far beyond friendship. It applies to any group, community, or relationship where people have to do life together.
 
Key Takeaways
[0:01:52] Applying friendship lessons to any group or community setting 
[0:02:15] Responding to conflict by pausing, praying, and looking for underlying hurt 
[0:04:49] Treating criticism as potential insight into blind spots and growth areas
[0:07:30] Repairing conflict by owning your part and offering uncomplicated apologies 
[0:09:09] Using clear priorities to guide boundaries and saying no
[0:12:11] Viewing boundaries as tools to stay healthy, not to punish others
[0:15:30] Practicing contentment and empathy when friends enter life stages you desire 
[0:21:54] Staying peaceful and respectful with friends who hold different beliefs or views 
[0:24:00] Recognizing how friends shape everyday choices, resources, and habits 
[0:31:07] Evaluating what kind of friend you are and how your friendships center around Christlike growth 
Key Scriptures
Romans 12:18 (referenced) "As much as it is within you, be at peace with all men."
Proverbs 13:20 "He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm."
Episode Takeaways
 
The next time you want to fire back, wait. Give yourself at least a few hours before responding to a message or conversation that stung. Then ask two questions: what is the hurt underneath what they actually said, and is there any truth to it? Let those answers guide what you do next.
 
Go through your phone and think about what each friendship is producing. Is there someone you only call to vent? Is there someone who only calls you for the same reason? That friendship is worth a quiet, honest look. Not judgment, just clarity about whether it is helping either of you grow.
 
Ask someone close to you one question this week: how do I come across to people? Ask for one honest answer. When they give it, say thank you. Then sit with it and ask the Lord if it is true.
Resources + Links
Let’s Keep The Conversation Going! 
New episodes release every Thursday. Be sure to follow, rate, and subscribe so you don’t miss what’s coming next.
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/therhondaellis 
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/TheRhondaEllis 
Visit us at: http://cultivatingahome.com 
Did this episode help you? Share it with a friend who's drowning in clutter or noise and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It means everything to a new show.

Have you ever felt a little hurt that a friend didn't invite you over, didn't call you back, or didn't show up for you the way you would have shown up for her? In Episode 12 of Cultivating a Home, Rhonda and Melissa continue their conversation on friendship by tackling one of the most common things that quietly kills it: expectations.
 
Rhonda shares a story from years ago, standing in a friend's backyard and wondering why she had never been invited over, only to realize later that she had been keeping score without meaning to. What God showed her changed how she has approached friendship ever since: people give differently, and the goal is not to expect reciprocity, but to recognize what someone is actually offering.
 
They talk through how to extend grace for someone else's season of life, what it looks like to build truly safe friendships where you can be vulnerable, and why receiving help is sometimes harder than giving it. Rhonda also shares a simple, practical habit that has deepened her friendships for years: writing down what matters to the people around her so she can actually show up for them.
 
This episode will change how you see every friendship in your life.
 
Topics Covered in This Episode
[0:01:45] Different Friends, Different Gifts
[0:03:30] Why Keeping Score Makes You Lose
[0:04:30] From “Here I Am” to “There You Are”
[0:05:10] Not Every Friendship Has to Be Deep
[0:06:57] The Text-Tally Trap
[0:07:20] Assuming the Best Changes Everything
[0:08:18] When They Keep Saying No
[0:08:38] Casual but Kind: Letting Friendships Be What They Are
[0:10:10] Don’t Miss a Hurting Friend Because You’re Hurt
[0:11:40] Casual Friends vs. Heart-Deep Friends
[0:12:30] Why “Keeping It Together” Blocks Real Connection
[0:14:59] Grace in the Mess of Different Personalities
[0:17:30] Outgrowing Legalism and Image-Management
[0:18:49] How Past Hurt Makes New Friends Feel Risky
[0:20:30] Risking Rejection to Build Real Friendship
[0:23:32] Ask Your Family: “What Kind of Friend Am I?”
[0:25:16] Blind Spots, Wounds, and Real Apologies
[0:27:43] Responding to Holy Spirit Nudges to Reach Out
[0:29:30] Deep Connection Without Constant Proximity
[0:32:42] Am I Lightening My Friends’ Loads or Adding Pressure?
Episode Takeaways
Name one friendship where you might be keeping score. Take it to the Lord honestly and ask Him to show you what that person is actually giving, even if it looks different than what you expected. Let go of the tally.
 
Start a simple system for remembering what matters to people. A note on your phone, a line in your planner, whatever works. The next time a friend mentions a doctor's appointment, a big event, or something hard coming up, write it down. Pray for them, then follow up afterward and ask how it went.
 
Ask someone you trust, "How do I come across to people?" Ask for just one honest answer. When they tell you, respond with "thank you," not with a defense. That single response is what tells them whether you are actually a safe place.
 
Resources + Links
 
Let’s Keep The Conversation Going! 
New episodes release every Thursday. Be sure to follow, rate, and subscribe so you don’t miss what’s coming next.Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/therhondaellis 
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/TheRhondaEllis 
Visit us at: http://cultivatingahome.com 
Did this episode help you? Share it with a friend who's drowning in clutter or noise and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It means everything to a new show.

Women can be surrounded by people and still feel completely alone. They can be in a good marriage, a full church, a busy life, and still crave the kind of friendship where they feel truly safe, seen, and understood.
In today’s episode, Rhonda and Melissa open a 3-part conversation on friendship: how to find it, what gets in the way, and why the biggest obstacle is usually the one staring back in the mirror. Rhonda walks through a simple but powerful framework she calls "Here I Am vs. There You Are." Most of us walk into a room thinking about ourselves, whether we are loud about it or quiet.
The shift happens when we walk in thinking about everyone else. She breaks down what that actually looks like in real conversations, with someone you have been meaning to get to know.
She also talks about insecurity, walls, jealousy, and the freedom that comes when you stop competing and start genuinely cheering for the people around you.
 
Part two continues next week. Make to Subscribe to the podcast - so you do not miss it.
 
Topics Covered in This Episode
[0:00:26] Why Women Still Feel Lonely in a Crowd
[0:02:24] Stop Waiting—How to Actually Make New Friends
[0:03:50] Simple Scripts for Asking Someone to Lunch
[0:06:12] Turn Everyday Activities into Friendship Opportunities
[0:06:57] The Biggest Obstacle to Friendship: Ourselves
[0:07:40] How Insecurity Sabotages Your Relationships
[0:08:38] Becoming a Better Listener and Less of a “One-Upper.”
[0:09:32] Do You Really Prioritize Friendship?
[0:10:34] Stuck in “Why Don’t They Like Me?”
[0:11:18] Here I Am vs There You Are
[0:13:20] Questions That Make People Feel Seen and Valued
[0:15:05] Friendship for Introverts and Extroverts
[0:16:12] Why Making Friends Is Hard for Every Temperament
[0:17:05] Shifting the Focus Off Yourself
[0:18:18] Intimidated by Her Gifts? Do This Instead
[0:19:30] Turn Jealousy into Curiosity and Learning
[0:20:32] Safe Friendships Where You Don’t Have to Pretend
[0:21:27] Be the Friend Who Assumes the Best
[0:21:50] Friendship, Motherhood, and the Posture of Your Heart
Episode Takeaways
 
Try "There You Are" in one situation this week. The next time you walk into a room where you do not know many people, before you think about where you will sit or what people will think of you, look for one person who looks like they could use a conversation. Go to them. Ask one question. Then just listen.
Make a specific ask, not a vague one. Think of one person you have been meaning to get to know better. Do not text "we should get together." Text: "Would you want to grab lunch next Thursday? There is a place near you I have been wanting to try." Set the date in the message.
Find one thing to genuinely compliment this week. Think of someone whose gift or talent you have noticed but never said out loud. Say it. Not fluff. Something specific and true. Watch what it does to the dynamic between you.
Resources + Links
Let’s Keep The Conversation Going! 
New episodes release every Thursday. Be sure to follow, rate, and subscribe so you don’t miss what’s coming next.Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/therhondaellis 
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/TheRhondaEllis 
Visit us at: http://cultivatingahome.com 
Did this episode help you? Share it with a friend who's drowning in clutter or noise and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It means everything to a new show.

Every family has moments where someone starts digging a hole and cannot seem to stop. A stubborn toddler who will not admit what she did. A preteen with a tone that keeps escalating. A misread text between friends that is turning into something it never needed to be. A disagreement with a husband that has gone three rounds longer than it should have.
 
On today’s episode, Rhonda shares a simple phrase she developed for her youngest daughter, who reminded her a lot of herself: “I don't want to be in this mess.” Five words that interrupt the spiral, give a child language to stop digging, and open the door to restoration without shame.
 
Rhonda traces the phrase back to a fifth-grade classroom, a substitute teacher, a series of bad choices, and check marks on a chalkboard. She also walks through the biblical framework behind it: putting off one behavior and putting on its opposite, at every age from toddler to adult.
 
And then she gets personal about a two-year season when one of her children was recovering from a traumatic brain injury, and how a deep study of Psalms became the thing that kept her faith intact.
 
Practical, honest, and worth sharing with every mom you know.
 
Topics Covered in This Episode
Where "I don't want to be in this mess" came from, and why Rhonda created it
The fifth grade substitute teacher story and what kept making it worse
How to introduce the phrase to toddlers using role play and gentle coaching
Using it with young elementary kids who storm off and cannot find their way back
Preteens who can learn to interrupt their own behavior before it goes further
Self-awareness as a skill that can be taught, not just hoped for
James 1:19: quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to wrath
Proverbs 12:22: lying lips are an abomination, but those who deal truly are His delight
The put off / put on framework: you cannot remove a behavior without replacing it with something else
Using the phrase in marriage: "Honey, I don't want to be in this mess."
Romans 12:18: if it is possible, live at peace with all men
Anxiety and worry: putting off fear and putting on trust through Philippians 4:6
The traumatic brain injury season and what Rhonda learned from going through every Psalm
How every human emotion is represented in Psalms, and what always happens by the end
Praise music, journaling, and the consistency of showing up to God when everything is hard
How to include your children in hard family seasons without making them carry the burden
Using every situation as a teachable moment
 
Key Scriptures
James 1:19 "Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry."
Proverbs 12:22 "Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord, but those who deal truly are His delight."
Romans 12:18 "If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone."
Philippians 4:6 (referenced) "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God."
 
Listen in to learn more : 
[0:01:17] Fifth-Grade Meltdown Origin Story
[0:03:09] “I Don’t Want to Be in This Mess” Parenting Tool
[0:05:40] Role-Playing Repair with Young Kids
[0:06:54] Using the Phrase to Heal Sibling Conflict
[0:08:37] Preteen Self-Awareness & Interrupting Attitude
[0:09:55] Put Off / Put On Framework from Scripture
[0:11:06] Teaching Truth Over Lying with Proverbs 12:22
[0:14:18] Handling Misread Texts & Choosing Peace
[0:17:31] Trading Anxiety for Trust and Prayer
[0:18:40] Walking Through Trauma with Psalms
[0:21:40] Coaching Kids Through Hard Emotions Biblically
[0:23:19] Practical Tools: Journaling, Worship, Family Prayer
[0:25:23] Involving Siblings in Empathy and Care
[0:26:04] Using Every Trial as a Teachable Moment
 
Resources + Links
Let’s Keep The Conversation Going! 
New episodes release every Thursday. Be sure to follow, rate, and subscribe so you don’t miss what’s coming next.Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/therhondaellis 
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/TheRhondaEllis 
Visit us at: http://cultivatingahome.com 
Did this episode help you? Share it with a friend who's drowning in clutter or noise — and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It means everything to a new show.

What if the most generous thing you could give someone today cost nothing at all?
 
In today’s episode of Cultivating a Home, Rhonda and Melissa wrap up their two-part conversation on generosity by going beyond money and talents to two things most people never think to give intentionally: their time and their words.
 
Rhonda shares what it looked like to show up at the home of a grieving family with her children, a Sam's Club cart full of supplies, and no idea how they would get everything inside without making it about themselves. She talks about the difference between saying "let me know if you need anything" and actually showing up, and why being present without having answers is sometimes the most powerful gift you can offer.
 
Then the conversation shifts to the tongue. Rhonda introduces a phrase she has used in her home for years: " When you think something nice, say it.” She shares the moment her son told a waitress she had excellent people skills, and how that one specific, genuine observation brought the woman to tears.
 
The episode closes with the special plate tradition, a simple practice any family can start today to build a home where people speak life into each other.
Topics Covered in This Episode
What it means to give your time as an act of generosity
Looking for opportunities in the everyday places you already are: sports fields, ballet recitals, neighborhoods
The difference between "let me know if you need anything" and actually showing up with something specific
Texting instead of calling when someone is grieving, and why it works better
The Sam's Club run: showing up at a grieving family's home with a car full of supplies and no plan
The Art of Helping by Lauren Whitlow Briggs and the do's and don'ts of helping in hard situations
Karen's question about the garden tub: how to make a specific offer that is easy to say yes to
Learning to let people help you: the pride and the blessing on the other side of receiving
A generous tongue: why specific compliments land differently than general ones
When you think something nice, say it. Teaching this as a habit at home before asking kids to do it in public
The waitress story: what one elementary-aged boy noticed and said out loud
Speaking life into people without flattery: the difference between genuine observation and empty words
The special plate tradition: how to honor a family member with specific, real words
How to include toddlers in the special plate even before they can form full sentences
It is never too late to start. Start where you are today.
 
Key Scripture
Proverbs 22:9 (continued from Episode 8) "He who has a generous eye will be blessed, for he gives of his bread to the poor."
 
The Special Plate Tradition
 
The special plate is a red plate that says "You Are Special." One person is honored at a time. Everyone at the table goes around and shares something specific about that person: a character quality, a skill, a real story. Not flattery. Real, observed, genuine words.
 
How to start even if your kids are little: Whisper the words to them line by line and let them repeat. "You are special. Because you are my dad. I like it when you make pancakes with me." They are learning the rhythm long before they can do it on their own.
 
You do not need the plate. If you are on vacation or away from home, the concept travels. Pull chairs in a circle and do it anyway.
 
Episode Takeaways
[0:00:26] Expanding the Generosity Series to Time
[0:01:49] Training Children to See Needs and Serve
[0:05:02] Ministry of Presence in Times of Suffering
[0:09:56] Practicing Practical, Specific Help in Crisis
[0:17:45] Learning to Receive Help and Let Others Bless You
[0:21:47] Cultivating a Generous Tongue and Family Honor Traditions
 
Resources + Links
Book Referenced – Art of Helping by Lauren Whitlow Briggs https://www.amazon.com/Art-Helping-What-Someone-Hurting/dp/1589191668 
Let’s Keep The Conversation Going! 
New episodes release every Thursday. Be sure to follow, rate, and subscribe so you don’t miss what’s coming next.Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/therhondaellis 
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/TheRhondaEllis 
Visit us at: http://cultivatingahome.com 
Did this episode help you? Share it with a friend who's drowning in clutter or noise — and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It means everything to a new show.

Generosity is not just about money. And it is not just for people who have a lot of it.
 
In this episode of Cultivating a Home, Rhonda and Melissa open up a conversation about what it looks like to raise genuinely generous kids, starting with financial giving and then going somewhere most people never think to look. 
 
Rhonda shares how she took six children to the bank to open savings accounts and set up four envelopes: tithe, give, save, and spend. She talks about keeping a pre-written card and a bill in your purse so you are always ready when God prompts you. And she tells the story of the Christmas gifts that sat in the back of her car for weeks with no plan for delivery, until the doorbell rang at a party, and the answer walked right in.
 
Then the conversation shifts to something bigger: the talents, skills, and gifts your family already has, and how to start seeing them as tools for blessing others. From coaching youth basketball to showing up with a vacuum cleaner, this episode will change how you look at what you have to offer.
 
Part one of two. Next week, the conversation continues.
 
Topics Covered in This Episode
Proverbs 22:9 and what it means to have a "generous eye"
Teaching kids to give anonymously at restaurants, and why anonymity matters
The pre-written card in your purse: a simple, practical way to always be ready to give
The four-envelope money system: tithe, give, save, spend
How Rhonda connected allowance to scripture memory and character goals
Heather's friend, who needed shoes, was taught to notice a need and act on it
The grocery store trip, the Diet Dr. Pepper, and the hair ties nobody planned
Expect. Trust. Obey. The three-word framework for following the still small voice
Why our hesitation to give usually comes down to thinking about ourselves
How to describe someone else's need to your kids without pity or condescension
The Christmas doorbell story: gifts sitting in the back of the car for weeks, and how God solved the delivery problem
Giving talents beyond what you would see in a talent show
Upward basketball, nursing homes, etiquette, organizing, holding babies: what a real talent inventory looks like
"Lord, show me ways you've designed me uniquely" as a daily prayer
Showing up with a vacuum cleaner: what it looks like when the whole family gives their time together
 
Key Scripture
Proverbs 22:9 "He who has a generous eye will be blessed, for he gives of his bread to the poor."
Episode Takeaways
Put something in an envelope and carry it. It does not have to be a lot. Write a short note inside. Keep it in your purse and wait for the person God puts on your mind. Then give it without waiting for a thank you.
Do a talent inventory with your family. Sit down together and list out what each person is actually good at, including the things that would never make it onto a stage. Ask: How could this skill be used to bless someone else right now? Pray over the list.
Include your kids the next time you give. Let them help pick the person, contribute from their own giving envelope, and carry the bag to the door. The experience of giving together is the lesson. You do not have to explain it afterward.
Timestamps [0:01:56] Developing a “Generous Eye” in Everyday Life
[0:02:33] Teaching Kids to Secretly Pay for Someone’s Meal
[0:08:05] Kids’ Tithe–Give–Save–Spend System
[0:12:02] “Expect, Trust, Obey” as a Lifestyle of Giving
[0:22:26] Using Kids’ Talents to Serve Others
Resources + Links
This topic continues next week in Episode 9. Subscribe so you do not miss part two, and share this episode with a friend who needs a fresh perspective on what generosity can look like.
Let’s Keep The Conversation Going! 
New episodes release every Thursday. Be sure to follow, rate, and subscribe so you don’t miss what’s coming next.Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/therhondaellis 
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/TheRhondaEllis 
Visit us at: http://cultivatingahome.com 
Did this episode help you? Share it with a friend who's drowning in clutter or noise — and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It means everything to a new show.